Tuesday, September 27, 2011

blind.

Let’s go back in time and visit a land where I wasn’t blind and had no idea I couldn’t see what everyone else could. A time when I thought all images were a little blurry around the edges- you know, like when you were a kid and swam in the pool with your eyes open for too long. They turned bright red and put a nice blurry glow around everything you looked at.

It all started back in 1995- sitting in the back of my 6th grade math class with my Limited Too sweater and matching scrunchy. Looking back, I can’t remember if I was assigned that seat or if I sat back there because it was the place where all the cool kids sat. The truth was, I actually really like math so whenever it was time to take notes from the blackboard, I would leave my seat and go sit cross legged on the floor just in front of the teacher. That was probably the first time I realised I couldn’t see as well as everyone else. Eventually my parents took me to see the optometrist who confirmed my worst nightmare…. I needed GLASSES.

I will never forget the day I got my first pair of glasses. Although I vowed to never wear them outside of the classroom, I couldn’t resist trying them out the second they reached my little hands. As I walked out of the doctor’s office I slipped them on my face and saw a whole new world. I remember looking at my dad in amazement- THIS is what the world looks like. I was shocked when I looked at a tree and saw individual leaves instead of a big green blob. It was like a whole new world!

As the years went by, my eye sight continued to dwindle. While I never wore my glasses full time, I started wearing contacts a year later. Every year I would return to the optometrist who would adjust my prescription and send me on my way. Each year a little worse- each year new and improved contacts for blind people like me.

Fast forward to two weeks ago… my annual appointment came up and off I went to the optometrist like clockwork. Although I have been in Australia for nearly 3 years, it was the first time I saw an optometrist over here. I always make my appointments in the United States during our trips home (creature of habit I guess). After my appointment was over and my doctor confirmed that my eye sight was exactly the same as last year (yea!) she went on to suggest that maybe it was time I thought about surgery.

blind1


I have always toyed with the idea of Lasik Eye Surgy, but the thought of someone cutting my eye open while I lay there helpless and AWAKE really scared me off. What if I moved while that laser was doing its thing in my eye?! What if I went blind all because I wanted a little less hassle in my life?! Was that really worth it?? I gave myself a week to think about it and decided I would go see the surgeon for a consultation. No obligation- if I was too freaked out I would just go home and never think about it again.

blind2

Leading up to the consultation I had to wear my glasses for two days. Doesn’t sound too bad does it? Well, it was! I am a contact wearer and HATE my glasses. They are uncomfortable and hurt the back of my ears. They fall off all of the time and get in my way. I can’t swim with them on and have a really hard time putting makeup on. No matter what Max says, they are not cute and I can’t see as well as when I am wearing contacts. Overall, you could say I am not the biggest fan of my glasses. But two days… I can do anything for two days.

blind3
[this is what things look like with my glasses/contacts]

Yesterday was my consultation. Even though I knew there would be no cutting involved in this appointment, I was nervous. Palms sweating, the surgeon called me in to her office. She was really nice and calmed my nerves a little bit by telling me that going blind was not possible with the method they use and although you are awake for the surgery, they give you heaps of drugs to make you calm and happy (Yes- these were the first questions out of my mouth, haha). After that she proceeded to do lots of tests with several different machines. She put about 10 different drops in my eyes and before I knew it, I couldn’t see a thing- not even with my glasses on!

blind4
[this is what things look like WITHOUT glasses/contacts]

The appointment ended with a bit of a downer. Apparently I have a steep slope on the front of my eyes. While they can’t operate on eyes with this condition, she wanted to see me back in two weeks to look again. And you know what that means… TWO WEEKS OF WEARING MY GLASSES. Arrrrggggg.

blind

Fingers crossed everything works out and all of this glasses wearin’ will be worth it. Until then I guess it is back to 6th grade math class and being the dorky girl with the glasses.

3 comments:

  1. Aww you look good in your glasses! Don't hate me, but I am lucky enough to have 20/20 vision. My dad is blind as a bat and his glasses are super thick. When I was a kid, I used to put his glasses on to see what everything looked like to him since it made everything super blurry to me. Crazy!! Good luck with lasik if it goes through :)

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  2. Aw!! I haven't seen you wearing glasses since we were in middle school! I think you look so cute!

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  3. totally understand your pain!
    i have had lasik surgery (10 years ago now) and my eyes have deteriorated but that's just cos i'm getting old...ergh! I'm lucky really though, I now only wear glasses for driving or at work on the computer.
    if it's possible, i highly recommend you get it done
    em

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